Episode 6: Experiencing Loss and Staying Connected to Love with Christina McMurray
Join your host Betsy Bush as she speaks with Christina McMurray, the author of Live Laugh Fly. They discuss the hardship of losing her son through cancer, how she channeled her grief into writing a book, and the ways she still stays connected to her son.
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Transcript:
Betsy Bush (00:49):
My guest today is Christina McMurry. She is the author of live, laugh, fly a family journey through childhood cancer, unimaginable grief, and the realization that love never dies. Chris, it is so good to have you on the latest version. You've written a book about your family's experience with your son, Scott, who when he was 19, was diagnosed with a very rare type of cancer. Tell us about Scott.
Christina McMurray (01:22):
Scott. Just that just saying his name makes me smile, which is just such a joy. He just was the most interesting person I've ever met because even though I could try to be five steps ahead of him, I never could. Me. He was sweet. He was impulsive. He was funny. He was kind, he made us laugh. He made everybody laugh and he had so many friends and he taught me so much. He taught me so much about myself, about life. It was an honor to be his mom. It really is.
Betsy Bush (01:57):
I was really surprised by your book because it's really in three parts. You have the story about your relationship with your husband, Gene, the early years of your marriage, then your experience raising Scott and going through his illness and passing. And then you have a third part, which is kind of the unexpected part. But I want to start with the early days because you know, when we talk about the latest version and how we as women have many different parts to our lives and we pivot from one thing to another, but I want to give kudos to Gene because he has done something remarkable as well, that I think really he deserves a tremendous amount of credit. And you do too for writing so honestly about his years of addiction, but also recovery and coming back, and it was the unexpected part of your story. And I should say we know each other. We were, you know, friends at our Presbyterian church in Westchester county, New York. And you guys were just a nice church family with kids. You and Gene were youth group leaders just to show how you don't know everything that's going on in someone's life or has gone on in someone's life. Can you tell us a little bit about those early years?
Christina McMurray (03:23):
Yeah, I was 21 years old when I met Gene and he was 29. So we have close to an eight year difference in our relationship. And I had no idea what an alcoholic was. I wasn't raised around it. And in my mind it was just somebody laying on the street. And that was what an alcoholic was. I didn't know that it's somebody who I could love, who was funny, who was kind, who was, but they had a drinking problem. You know, I didn't know that. And we went through the first rehab when we were dating. And again, I didn't really understand all about it. And coming from the background, I did it, wasn't really talked about, you know, I came from a very strict Bronx Italian household. So it was more of like, they wanted me to just end things, you know, with him, but it's, it's just very difficult. So we did go through that. And then we, you know, he had stopped drinking for a little bit and then we had our children and you have some of the ups and downs, but then, you know, that started again. And at this point I had found a support group for women, for anybody who loves a family member with the disease. And I was learning more about it and also learning how to set up boundaries for myself, which is something I never did. You know? So, but then after I think like the third, I went through three rehabs with him, you know, and my children are younger and growing up. And then the last time when he told me about a serious drug addiction, I, there was no hesitation and it was just like, you need to leave. And my children were four and six at the time. And I was very scared because I had never been on my own, but now I'm on my own with two small children. But I also knew that I didn't want them raised in an environment of unstability like that. And so I asked him to leave and thank goodness he did, you know, he did. And he made his way eventually out to California, where he had close family members who had been in recovery and he had went there and we didn't have contact with him for years. My children never had the Disney dream of, oh, our parents will get back together. They never did. You know, I continued working and doing the daycare and doing the best I can.
Betsy Bush (05:43):
So you were actually divorced and then you started your at home childcare business.
Christina McMurray (05:50):
I started the daycare business when Kim was four months old. I used to be a diet technician and I was working at a rehabilitation center for like stroke victims and other in white Plains. And then after she was born, I did not want to go back to that setting because you have to work on weekends holidays. And I started watching one little girl and Kim was four months old and she was 14 months old. And then it just kind of grew from there. I always knew I wanted to be at home, you know, with my kids. And this was the perfect solution for me.
Betsy Bush (06:26):
So you really became a business owner. You were running this business in your house, you were on your own. So you were responsible for everything.
Christina McMurray (06:39):
For everything. Gene and I were divorced for eight years. I would say the first five years, I never received child support or alimony. So all the work it was, I was doing all of that, but, you know, I was happy too, because as long as I could work, I knew it would be okay. And I loved what I was doing. I love being around kids and I was able to be home with my kids. So I used to just pray for strength every day. Cause I figured if I'm strong, then I can work and everything else will fall into place, you know? And it did.
Betsy Bush (07:10):
But you started having some back issues at some point, right. And you were facing some serious surgery.
Christina McMurray (07:18):
Yeah, I was having back trouble because lifting two babies on my hip and where I lived was very hilly. So pushing the double stroller with like three babies in it. So I had some bouts of where I would just kind of collapse. Then they'd get me to a hospital. I was able to get like muscle relaxants and kind of be on my way. But after a couple years of that, after the last bout, the doctor was like, I'm risking paralysis. I need to have the fusion surgery. So that was a big decision because it was closing a 20 year business. And with that is your identity too.
Betsy Bush (07:56):
Of course, because you've derived so much strength from building up your business and supporting your kids. And so many women can identify with that identity of being the provider and you know, really your whole kid's world. It's really remarkable. And then at some point, Gene comes back into your life.
Christina McMurray (08:17):
Back at before the surgery. Thank goodness because I didn't even have health insurance on myself. So I never would have had that. He came back into our lives, I would say 1999 or so, or 98 after he got sober, he started to make phone calls to the kids. And he was kind of reestablishing a relationship in that way that he had been sober for a little bit. And the kids went out to California and spent a week with him and they had such a great time, which was nice. And then one day he called the, and he had started to send some money also. And so that was, and I could see that he was trying and everything. And then after he had a couple of years of sobriety, he had called and said that he was going to be moving back into the area so that he could be a part of the kids' life. And I was not happy at first. I was really, honestly, it was a scary thing. And I felt like, oh, he's treading on my stuff. Now I did all this and now he's gonna, you know, be doing that too. But you know, this is what was best for the kids also to have that relationship. So he did, he moved to Yonkers when he first came back and he lived there and he was able to go to the kids' games and he was able to be a part of their life, which was really good.
Betsy Bush (09:35):
And when we look back on it now, thank goodness he was back. Yeah. And let me just say, Jean is a great guy and it is so encouraging to see this story and the arc it has because for so many people it would stop when gene went away and then, you know, for so many families, that person never comes back, but Gene comes back and is there for you when you needed your surgery and you've had to close your business? Is that right?
Christina McMurray (10:08):
Well, what happened was he came back and he was, you know, establishing relationship with the kids. And I was just cordial at that point, you know, I was kind of cordial. I still had some anger issues with him that hadn't been resolved. And then one day we were all at Scott's baseball game and I saw our daughter sit with me for like 15 minutes and then go sit with Gene for 15 minutes and that ping ponging. And I just looked at that, that one time and I was like, oh no, no, no, no. So I called him up and I just said, we need to go and talk. You need to hear what I have to say, because I don't want to feel this way. I really don't. And I don't want the kids feeling that drama in between. And actually before that, they had like tried to spend like an overnight with him or things, you know, trying to establish that. And it was really on the kids' schedules of what they were comfortable with because when he left, they will afford six. But when he came back, they were like 11 and 13 or so, I mean, a lot of time had passed. So, and then one time I remember saying to the kids, like, you know, are you angry at dad? You know, like for what had gone on. And they were just like, no, because he missed out, we had a good life he missed out. And then that was just a turning point in how I looked at it also.
Betsy Bush (11:24):
Wow. What an insight, what an insight that is for your children to understand that, right? Yeah,
Christina McMurray (11:30):
It really was. So then when we went out and we talked and I was like, how could you have done this? And we just like really for hours hashed, everything out and cried and you know, all that. But then once we did and he asked for forgiveness and truly wanting forgiveness and I did, I felt a thousand pounds lighter also. And then from that, once we were able to forgive, then I could be in the same room with him. And then the next thing I know, I'm laughing again. And then the next thing after that, I'm like, uh oh, I'm falling in love with him again, you know? And it was scary. And I didn't really tell anybody, cause I didn't want people saying you're crazy. You're crazy. And again, it was that another leap of faith to take. And so then the four of us went and eloped at Hitchcock, you know, and then the four of us went on a honeymoon to Vermont. And that was in 2000 that we did that. And then I had to close the business in 2006, it was or seven, 2007, I think
Betsy Bush (12:37):
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Betsy Bush (13:32):
And so you close the business, you had your surgery genus back in your life and then the other shoe falls
Christina McMurray (13:39):
And the other shoe falls. Yeah, I was had the surgery in September. I got out of the body brace that they put on for that in March. And then Scott got sick. The following December, he started complaining about, you know, a neck or his back, but then January 1st was when he went to the hospital. And again, I mean the timing is just amazing on it.
Betsy Bush (14:02):
You had a long three years with Scott. He was diagnosed with a very rare type of cancer that only affects 200 people in the country. And yet Scott was one of them and a long painful treatments for a little while there he looked to be in remission. He had come home from college. Was that his freshman year? That Christmas break when he was starting to feel not so well.
Christina McMurray (14:31):
Yeah, he came home the Christmas break and we were actually getting ready to go to church for Christmas Eve and I, and he was like, mom, do you have a belt? And I noticed, I mean, he was always thin, he was six two. And he used, he weighed 1 75. So he was always thin but healthy looking. And when he asked for that belt, I noticed, wow, he's thin, but he's not a great eater, you know, and he's away at school. And so I'm just thinking, you know, that's just it. And then at new year's Eve, he started really complaining of his neck hurting and I do whatever, you know, a parent does for that part at 19 years old. When are you going to go out? That's like a real test, you know? And he's like, yeah. And so I just kind of gave him a couple aspirin and he went out and we were really comfortable that night because where the party was, all the kids were staying. So I was just like, all right, he's good. We had pizza before Kim was good. She was doing her. So we went and we went to the movies with Gene's sisters. And so do you know, that always would be my last normal night. They are in to do a new year's Eve of 2007 going into 2008. And then the next morning he called at about six in the morning to say, if I could come pick him up, he doesn't feel good. So I went and I picked him up and again, the way he's moving in the car with that neck, and I just said, you know what? The emergency room let's just go. You probably need a muscle relaxer and you a pledge in some fraternities, you know, let's just go and think, and again, he's going to say no, no, no, I just want to go to sleep. And he was just like, okay. So I'm like, oh, he doesn't feel good. So brought him in and then just test after test to their credit. They didn't make me worry that day too much. They wanted to keep him, they did see some masses in his lungs, but we weren't sure if it was a pneumonia type, you know, they did an MRI on his neck. They showed some trauma again. They're not really knowing what it is. So they decided to keep him overnight and really didn't raise a lot of flags with us. And then the next day is when all the other tests were coming in.
Betsy Bush (16:36):
Yeah. A 19 year old with cancer who believes it and who understands it. And there's just nothing anyone can say to you that makes it better or makes anyone really understand why that happens.
Christina McMurray (16:50):
No. And you know, I did realize after then we had transferred to a children's hospital, children's hospital at Montefiore. And I would get to know the other mothers there too, you know, and not one of us when we brought our kids to the emergency room, it ever crossed our mind of cancer. If someone's leg hurts, who would you really think that's a bone cancer? What, you know, you as a mom, you just don't think that, so you are blindsided with it, but you have to just do what's right for your child.
Betsy Bush (17:22):
You have this great picture on the cover of your book of Scott going skydiving. And you have to explain to us what that picture is all about.
Christina McMurray (17:32):
Oh, I love that pictures here in the office as I'm looking at it too. Yeah, when he got into remission, he couldn't do it during treatment because of blood clotting. So but right afterwards there was a woman at the hospital, Sandy Candy, who, the pinwheel project and they give gifts to kids and try to make, you know, do what a child would like after you have like a bone marrow or stem cell, they may decorate their whole room because the child is in the hospital for about a month. At that time. And Scott being on the older end of it at 19, it was like, you know, they're not going to decorate his room in a princess castle, you know, or anything like that. But what would he like? And then she had a connection with Skydive the Ranch in New Paltz. And she said, do you think he would like that? And I'm like, oh, I know he would like that. So we, me and Jane drove him up there and we sat on the chair and received takeoff. And it was like, what color is his? You know? And they tell us, and then you see him flying down and then they made a movie of it, a video for him. Cause you don't see what's going on. And then you just see them coming down and they made this video and we looked at it and he was like, there's his smile. We hadn't seen that smile in like a year. And it was beautiful, you know? And then we just said, it I'm like, do you want to enroll in the classes? And he did. And so I enrolled him in the classes and whenever we could, I drive him up to Newpaltz and he went into the classes and he would jump out of planes and he ended up jumping 15 times.
Betsy Bush (19:08):
Wow. I don't know many parents. Of course he's a 19 year old. Who would, you know, allow, you know, some, some kid who is, you know, getting treatment for cancer to go skydiving. But then again, why not?
Christina McMurray (19:23):
You know, I couldn't wrap him in bubble wrap, which is, I would have loved to, but I, you know, I couldn't and I had to really learn how to let it go and to take that step back because as a mom, especially you want to do everything for them, make sure they don't get hurt, make sure this makes sure that, but Scott was going to do it his way. And after some headbutting on his way, I just decided I need to just make sure I'm standing next to him during all of this. And whatever time he has left. He was handed really a terminal illness from the time he was 19, we didn't have expectations that we knew it was going to come back. And we knew, you know, our time is limited and we wanted him to just love his time that he has. And he drove across country too. I mean, he did, that was nuts, but he did it, you know, so many thin.
Betsy Bush (20:21):
And his doctors supported his adventures. Didn't they?
Christina McMurray (20:27):
Like I thought, at least on that one, it's better for the doctors to say no, Scott, you can't do that then for me to say that. So when he said he was driving across country, I'm thinking, I'm just not going to say anything. The doctors will tell him he can't do that. And then they were like, that's great. Walmart gal where you can his medication to them. I'm like, okay. So I guess that's what we're doing. And I'm so glad he did it, you know? And we did, we would be in contact, where are you going to be in two days? And that's where we would mail medication. So in a way, we were able to keep track of them and he had his freedom and it was amazing. I thought the trip was just going to be to Florida. Cause I heard him talking to his friend about a road trip and I'm hearing some Southern states. I'm like, oh Florida, that's not bad. Two days he'll go to Disney world. And then when he was like, no, I'm driving to California. It was like, what? Okay, all I could do is stand next to him and applaud and support, you know?
Betsy Bush (21:25):
Wow. I started out saying your book has three parts. And the third part is really, to me, the most remarkable your book doesn't end when Scott passes away, because there's more to that story. And this is the really remarkable thing. Can you tell me a little bit about your experiences after you have a very moving description of the morning Scott passed away. He passed away at home, but there were certain things that you felt that maybe Scott was still with you in some ways. Can you just kind of describe some of your experiences?
Christina McMurray (22:04):
It was a short time after he passed. I'm not even a week. And I remember I was sitting on the front porch, which was all I was able to make it to for a while was just that front porch, me and the dog. And I remember sitting there and it was a beautiful day. It was probably 80 degrees or so it was a beautiful May day and I'm on the porch. And I remember just like crying and saying, oh, are you there, Scott? Are you there? And I would say it out loud, you know, are you there? And this cold wave, it was just like this cold that I even shivered came all down. And it wasn't like in my body, it was in the air, a cold air, all just like enveloped me. And I remember shivering and then being like "is this, you Scott, is this you?. And I didn't want to say anything to anybody because I think my family was so worried about me anyway, you know, with grief. And so I didn't say anything and I just kept that to myself. And then, you know, we had the whole thing, the birds nest, you know, a couple of days later after that and which was so amazing that for all those years, I always put my house plants onto the porch. And then after Scott had passed, and again, it's like within just a short time, a couple of weeks, I'm sitting there with a large Labrador and the bird is right in a plant next to me and it's sitting there and sit and it made this beautiful nest and then had three beautiful eggs in there. And it was like, I'm watching her and the mother bird. And it was just like amazing that she didn't fly way with this dog or me. And we, it was kind of this unspoken agreement. Like you do your thing, I'll do my thing. And we'll just kind of coexist on this porch. And then I watch and, you know, and there was three eggs that had popped up and then I, one egg did not make it. And we put that in the garden, but the others had made it. Wow. And it was so interesting because starting with four eggs and then there were three eggs and I watched her as the eggs, you know, cracked as they, the beaks were up looking at her, I watched her get food. I watched her teach them to fly and fly off. And then that one egg was there and I put it in the garden then. And I remember Scott's nurse came that night for dinner and I was telling her all about it. And she goes, well, that's the way it is. And I said, what do you mean? And she says, well, there were four of you and now there's three. And it all, you could see that connection. I was like, whoa, okay. And when you look at that nest, it's got a blue ribbon all through it. It gave me so much hope that nest, you know, it just was such a beautiful experience to just see that. And still, I'm not thinking anything, you know, I'm kind of just like, wow, that's really cool. You know, but I'm not putting so much together,uof signs or anything, but I, I, I'm starting to notice. And every time that I would cry out for him, there was always a sign immediately to show that he was there, that he was, and it was every time I cried out. And it was so funny at one point that I said, I'm having more contact with you now than your first semester at college, you know, but I would just write down the sign so I don't forget it. And then two years later I was boarding a plane to New York to help at my friend's farm. And I sit down next to a woman, you make the small talk. And then she just says, she's going to Maine for energy healing and,uyou know, going to New York. And then she started asking about my children and if I have any, and that's always a hard question. Cause if I don't say Scott, then I apologize in my head. If I do, I run the risk of her being uncomfortable. But I decided to tell her, I said, oh, I have somebody passed away two years ago. And she just said, your son, is he a writer? Are you a writer? And she just kept asking and finally sh told me she was a medium and he's been sending me signs to show, I'm supposed to write a book to help other grieving families. Wow. And I believed her. I believed her, you know, she said a lot of things that nobody would know and the signs were there. And so I did.
Betsy Bush (26:29):
It's amazing. So tell me about your experience writing the book because so many people think, oh, I'm going to write a book about this, but it's not easy to write a book.
Christina McMurray (26:37):
I'll never do it again too. So it was hard. I'm not a writer. I take care of, you know, I, I'm not a writer, but what happened was I first I started with the signs because that's where we will go on with it. But in order to understand where my faith is, then with the, how it started to grow, like with the signs I had to go back to the past and that had to include my early life with Gene and those struggles and just everything that led us up to that point. So that's where I started. It was where I met Gene, because that's, to me that is really where I feel like my life began.
Betsy Bush (27:16):
Sure. And how long did it take you to write?
Christina McMurray (27:21):
It took years to write because I would start writing, but then the memories would become so painful that I would, I'd be ugly, crying. It was terrible. I would have to put it away for months at a time. And then when I felt strong enough, I'd see it in that drawer. And I'm like, all right, let me go back to it. And so I would keep doing it and the signs kept coming, you know, and every time I thought, okay, the book is done now, no, it's not something else just came that, you know, I'd have to write about.
Betsy Bush (27:53):
You have an interesting memory of Scott when he was maybe three or four. And you talk about, you ask him, you know, what's he going to be when he grows up? And he has an interesting response to that.
Christina McMurray (28:08):
Yeah. He was probably about eight or nine at that time. Uthe daycare is in full swing and always after school, I would get the after kids and we would always have snack and I would initiate a, a topic of conversation, you know, for all the kids sitting at the table. And just one is what are you going to be when you grow up and know, you know, a lot of the little boys. So I'm a policeman, I'm a fireman, a teacher, all of, you know that and it comes to Scott's turn and he looks at me and he says, I don't picture myself growing up. And I'm like, Scott, how could you say that? And he's like, no, I, I don't think I'm, I don't picture myself growing up. I can't picture that. And I said, well, I think you'd be a great teacher. And we kind of just left it at that. But that conversation I do think about because his cancer is a DNA based cancer, they said. And so I always wonder, was there something inside of him that knew because Scott, our biggest argument, with Scott of him growing up was think about tomorrow, think about the consequences, you know? And he would actually say present, Scott can not worry about what future Scott does. I mean, like, I don't know how a child thinks like that, but he did. He never thought of himself in the future. It was always just that day. And as a parent, it's so frustrating, but I realized now that was, that was his saving grace too, because he didn't worry about this, you know, even in treatment, it was always just today.
Betsy Bush (29:39):
I'm kind of speechless at all of that, because that was one of the things that, that, yeah. You know, there are all these things we, we wonder about and think about, and don't really have answers to, talk about all the signs and you have some interesting connections to Beatles songs. Tell me a little bit about that.
Christina McMurray (29:58):
Yeah. What a great blessing that was. I was always a Beatles fan. So as Jane and growing up, I always just played the classic rock and roll for the kids and stuff. And Scott really, really identified with the Beatles, especially John Lennon, you know, he just really loved him and,
Betsy Bush (30:17):
Oh, that's wonderful.
Christina McMurray (30:19):
Well one thing in the hospital that was so cool was that but right before his stem cell transplant, he has like three days to be on medications. So we had his laptop and Yoko Ono had made a lot of home movies to John's music. And so it was so cool because you could see their interactions along with the music. And we would watch these videos for hours and just talk about the Beatles and the lyrics and everything. And one day when he was sleeping, I made my way down to the social worker and I said, you couldn't know what you'll go on. And it was addresses and foam. She pulls it up instantly. And so while he's sleeping, I just wrote her a letter, thanking her for putting all this music together because how cool that I can bond with my son over music at 19 years old, usually, you know, parents are like, what are they listening to? You know, but this was just such a great bonding experience. So I wrote her that letter thinking nothing. It was just a letter of gratitude. And then like a year later she sent an autographed picture of her and John that's sitting up in the bed and to Scott and wrote this beautiful note. It was just so cool. And we always did like our volunteer services when we always volunteered. And we always, you know, take a sad song and make it better. We would do that and really let it be became one of our mantras because we don't know what's going to happen, you know, and we just have to let it be. And so we do, we still do.
Betsy Bush (31:50):
And places where you go, you happen to hear those songs on the radio, you know, over the sound system, in a taxi cab, that's such an interesting connection to have.
Christina McMurray (32:02):
Yeah And that was in Costa Rica and it was our first Christmas without Scott. And I knew I had to get away and, and away from New York and just be away. I didn't know how I was going to handle our first Christmas without him, but I knew I was going to be far away. So Scott had taught me how to use the internet. I never knew how to do it. Well now I'm typing on just like volunteer destinations at Christmas where it's warm and all this stuff pops up. And all of a sudden I see volunteering with the turtles, turtle conservation in Costa Rica. The next thing I know I had us all signed. So Gene's watching a Yankee game in the living room and I had booked us a Costa Rica and you know, turtle conservation. I'm like, now I got to go tell him what I did.
Christina McMurray (32:50):
So I go out there and I'm just like, guess what we're doing? You know, this Christmas saving the turtles. And we deal, we had, it was an amazing week. It really was. And on the way in the cab, we're headed to a hotel after it was all done. And I'm thinking to myself, oh, Scott, you would have loved this. You would have loved this so many times I just will talk in my head to him. I'm like, you would have loved this. And literally after I had said that in this Spanish speaking taxi, Hey, Jude comes on with "Take a Sad Song and make it better." So I'm going to make it better. And I know that it's him. I know that it's him.
Betsy Bush (33:29):
Oh my gosh that is amazing. You know, your experience with Scott was so different from the experiences that a lot of people are having in this age of COVID. You had a long time to understand the process, what was happening, what was going to happen? You were close to him. He died at home. You were near to each other, watching movies together. You think about people who are taken away. Suddenly they die alone in a hospital. Is there something you can say or offer to folks who are grieving in this very different way?
Christina McMurray (34:04):
You know, I think of that often. And if I'm to say, I am lucky that he had cancer, it sounds weird to say that, but I am in that we knew. And we had that chance to say goodbye. And so I am lucky in that way. Our end versions are the same of trying to have a life without somebody you love. But the process I am luckier than people who have gone through his sudden death. You know, I, I am. And I, I, I acknowledge that, but I also know that in the end process they are with us, they are with us and they're watching us and they they're guiding us in a, in a way also. And they want us to talk to them. They want us to remember and to remember the good. And I remember the first time I laughed after Scott died, I felt guilty. I felt guilty. How could I laugh? My son has gone. How could I laugh? So that first time that you do laugh and you do find that joy, you have to realize they want you to, they want you to, they don't. He would say to me, you're my biggest worry. You're my biggest worry. I need you to be okay. And they all do. That's what love is, you know, we want them to be okay and they want us to be okay.
Betsy Bush (35:20):
Chris, I can't thank you enough for sharing your experience with us. And this has been just such a powerful conversation. I hope everyone who listens to this take something away that is life affirming and joyful. And there's just something very deep in what you've been able to share with us and through your book. And let me just tell our listener that Live, Laugh, Fly by Christina MacMurray can be purchased on Amazon. And she also wants us to say that a portion of the proceeds will benefit pediatric cancer organizations, which is a very generous thing. Thank you, Christine. Thank you so much for being on the latest version.
Christina McMurray (36:09):
Thank you for having me.
Betsy Bush (36:10):
And I wish you and Gene and Kim all the best and you know, long, long, and happy life to all of you.
Christina McMurray (36:19):
Thank you so much. I hope to talk to you soon.
